RAVI SHARMA....WHO?

Many years ago, there was a naval party in Vishakhapatnam to which a number of civilian dignitaries were invited. A colleague of mine went up to one of them and introduced himself thus, “Good evening, sir. I am …. son-in-law of….”  I recall smirking then at what I thought was a funny way to introduce oneself by throwing in a connection of someone well-known. Over the years, however, I realize that my colleague was right. When I introduce myself to strangers by just my name, their probable reaction is, “Ravi Sharma who? For all I care, you could be Chunni Lal or Ghasita Ram!”

As William Shakespeare famously wrote, “What’s in a name?” By itself, nothing. What matters is that either you are famous yourself or can boast of a connection to someone important so that your name could have some weight. Most of us fall in the latter category. I certainly do. 

My Nanaji was a respected High Court Judge known for his honesty and lucid and well-reasoned judgments. In my younger days, it helped if I told people that I was his grandson. My mother, starting as a long-serving headmistress of a popular girls’ high school in Jaipur and rising to become Director of Sanskrit Education, Rajasthan, had earned recognition all over the state and won many awards. I would proudly proclaim I was her son. Indeed, even today, long after she is gone, I can quote her name in Jaipur and go up a notch or two in people's eyes.

In the Navy, introductions were not necessary as one had to wear a name tally on one’s chest. In fact, one was known more by one’s appointment than by name. For instance, a Captain of a ship would be known by its name; so I was Katchall for some time followed by Trishul.

Nevertheless, I did have connections in the Service. Both my Mamas had joined the Indian Navy in its nascent stage. The number of officers was small and everyone knew everyone else. Long after I retired, I wrote a few ‘middles’ which were published and I received a letter from Admiral Russi Ghandhi saying that he had enjoyed reading them but asking who I was. I replied that I was Cmde Vinnie Sharma’s nephew and he wrote back that coming from that family, I must be an okay guy!

The same connection may not work well with all. Vinnie Mama and an officer  senior to him were together on the training staff at the Joint Services Wing, Clementown, Dehradun. The senior officer thought Vinnie Mama was too flamboyant and did not like him. The individual rose to the rank of Vice Admiral and became Chief of Personnel. Vinnie Mama specifically told me that he should never be told about our relationship. I wonder if the fact became known to him anyway and was one of the reasons for my initial non-selection for Staff College!

Now, though many years after retirement, I thought that in the Navy my name would be recognised. Recently, I asked a friend of mine who knows a serving Vice Admiral well, to request the latter for help in making some arrangements for my visit to Chennai. I quote from the message my friend wrote to the Vice Admiral, “A small request from Cmde RN Sharma, father of well known Economist Ruchir Sharma….” Obviously my name was not enough and the reference must have carried weight because the arrangements exceeded my expectations!

I suffer from no ego and if I am recognised more by my connections than by my name, so be it. There is one time though when I felt things had gone too far. As a bachelor, I had a pet dog named Lucky, a cute, creamish Pomeranian. As a pup, Lucky had fallen from a bed and fractured its right foreleg which gave it a peculiar, prancing gait. It was charming to watch Lucky as it approached you wagging its tail and looking at you with soulful eyes beseeching to be hugged and petted. It was so popular with my friends' kids that they called me not by my name but as “Lucky Uncle” which I thought was a bit much!

Amazingly, while writing this, a poem appeared on my computer screen, “I’m Nobody! Who are you?” by Emily Dickinson. It is eminently suitable to be quoted in this context:

“I’m Nobody! Who are you?

Are you-Nobody-too?

Then there’s a pair of us!

Don’t tell! They’d advertise-you know!

How dreary-to be-Somebody!

How public-like a Frog-

To tell one’s name-the livelong June-

To an admiring Bog!”

P.S. Latest connection: A few weeks back, I have acquired an in-law relationship with the all-time great West Indian cricketer, Vivian Richards and Neena Gupta, the famous actress.