ON BOARD INSV SUDARSHINI IN NEW YORK

Old and tired of long flights, Akhila and I had no plans to go to New York this year. Then Shumita's elder son, Shiven, got selected to do a two-week summer course at Yale from where Shumita herself had post-graduated. She made plans to go to NYC with her boys and asked us to come too. At first, we declined but they along with Ruchir kept persuading us and finally we had to surrender! And so we flew from Delhi to NYC via Rome end-May planning our return after 4th of July which is Akhila's birthday. 

We have been aware since 1974 that 4 July is USA's Independence Day. That year I was doing my Staff  College course and we had as our neighbours a Major Mehle, US Army, his wife and three petite daughters. They invited us to a party on 4 July and that is how we came to know the importance of the day to Americans. We were all delighted that on that day, we were going to have a double celebration.

What we didn't know was that this year was the 250th anniversary of American independence. We learnt that only on arrival in New York as also that the celebrations were going to be on a big scale. Going through the long list of events slated for about a month, what caught my eye was the "Sail 4th 250" schedule which included an International Naval Review and a Parade of Sail. It occurred to me that Indian Navy might be sending a ship. I got in touch with my friends in NHQ who confirmed that INSV (Indian Navy Sailing Vessel) Sudarshini was on its way to New York to take part in the celebrations and gave me contact details of Cdr Ravikanth, Commanding Officer of the vessel.

Cdr Ravikanth messaged me to say that they were going to be in New York 04-08 July berthed at Brooklyn Pier 1 and invited us to visit the ship. So on 5th afternoon, after the ship had finished her official commitment of participation in the Review and Parade of Sail, Akhila, Ruchir and I went on board for a memorable visit being the first time we were visiting a vessel of this kind and that too in foreign shores!

A smart cadet took us on a round of the vessel. Sudarshini is a sail training ship built by Goa Shipyard for our Navy and commissioned on 27 January 2012. She is a three-masted barque with the mainmast 113 feet high thus qualifying to be called a 'tall ship.' With a length of 54 metres (177 feet), she is fitted with 20 sails supplemented by two engines for sailing in unfavourable wind conditions. She has a crew of 5 officers and 31 sailors and can remain at sea for over 20 days at a time. Her prime purpose is to train naval and coast guard cadets in sailing, seamanship and navigation and can accommodate 30 cadets at a time.

Sudarshini has been a great ambassador for Indian Navy right from the word go. In her very first year, she visited 13 ports in 9 ASEAN countries and embarked foreign cadets from the latter. Till 2025, she had covered 140000 nautical miles equivalent of 260000 kms. This year, she departed Cochin (I still love the old name for Kochi) on 20 January for Lokayan 26, a 10-month long transoceanic sail expedition across 18 ports and 13 countries covering 22000 nautical miles. Before arriving in the USA, she had taken part in the French tall ship marine festival of Escale a Sete 2026.

Apart from New York, the ship participated in Sail 250 events in Norfolk, Baltimore and Boston in the USA. As I write this, I learn that the ship has started on its return journey to India by first heading to Ponta Delgado, Azores, Portugal.

In 1986, as the Defence Adviser in Singapore, it was my pleasure and privilege to host Trishna, the first Indian sail boat to circumnavigate the oceans. 40 years later, it was a delight to step on board a proper sailing ship halfway across the world from India, in foreign waters.

May fair winds always be with Sudarshini.

CENTURION WENGER'S AND OTHER CP HAUNTS

Recently, there have been a number of articles on Wenger's, perhaps the oldest confectionery in Delhi, celebrating its 100th anniversary. I have myself been frequenting it since early 1950s and it is definitely my number 1 as far as confectioneries go. Anytime I go to Connaught Place, I indulge in its Lemon Tart, and for birthdays and anniversaries, it is my go-to place for a Black Forest Cake and Cheese Straws. 

Karan Thapar in his recent Hindustan Times column "The delight Wenger's has been for Delhi for 100 years", traces the history of the confectionery and then goes on to write about his other old favourite shops in Connaught Place some of which no longer exist. And that triggered my memory of my own old haunts in days of yore.

A shop I shall never forget was "Marques and Co." which for ages had been a market leader in selling musical instruments. My association with it again goes back to the early '50s when I was studying in St. Xavier's School in Jaipur. I had become a regular listener of Radio Ceylon and its Western music but the only source of my own records was Vinnie Mama's annual visits home on leave from the Navy. Then Rajendra 'Sunny' Sahai, two years my senior and elder brother of my dear friend Yadu, went to Delhi to study in St. Stephen's and informed me that Marques in Connaught Place sold English records. From then on till I myself joined the Navy, whenever I went to Delhi which was quite often,  I would make a beeline to the shop and come out with an armload of 78 rpm records and Marques' Annual Songbook so that I could sing songs like "Don't Let The Stars Get In Your Eyes" correctly to someone, if required!

In 2001, after we moved to our present abode in New Delhi, Shumita wanted a piano. So off we went to Marques and Co. and selected a Yamaha. Marques Sr., the founder of the shop was no more and the shop was being run by his son who could play a number of instruments and had been a part of many bands. He readily offered to teach Shumita to play the piano. For many months till Shumita acquired the necessary skill and confidence, he came to our house regularly and we would gossip about songs, singers and bands of old times. Some years back, Marques Jr. passed away too and I learnt that with no one to run it, the shop also had to pull down its shutters. Sad!

The other haunt of mine was the The Cellar, a nightclub and discotheque with throbbing and pulsating music and psychedelic lights. Many an evenings I spent there including one in 1973 with Akhila on her birthday, 4th of July. Both of us have a vivid memory of a very pregnant foreign young lady, perhaps an American, jiving and twisting as if she were Jayne Mansfield in "The Girl Can't Help It"! Pity, The Cellar too ceased to exist quite sometime ago.

But Wenger's continues its journey into a second century and may it live long. Akhila and I visited it last evening and crowds were thronging it resulting in many items having been sold out. We met the modest and self-effacing former manager, Charanjeet Singh, who still spends a lot of time in the shop. We were glad to see that the shop is keeping pace with the times. For, while preserving the quality of its trademark products like cakes, tarts and cookies, it also stocks Macarons, Burger Pizza, and special breads like the Italian Foccacia.

As for us, we stuck to the good old Lemon Tart and Cheese Straws.

ROME - SAYINGS, MOVIES AND SONGS

Rome, known as the Eternal City for its history, legend and culture, is a city impossible not to love. The legend of its birth dates back to 753 B.C. Romulus and Remus were twins fathered by Mars, god of war, through a vestal virgin, Rhea Silvia, daughter of the king of Alba Longa overthrown by his tyrant brother. The latter ordered his minions to drown the infants in River Tiber but the men took pity, put them in a basket and floated them down the river. Washed ashore, the infants were nursed by a she-wolf, fed by a woodpecker and later, brought up by shepherds. Growing into adults, the young men restored their grandfather to the throne and decided to build a new city. Following a fight, Romulus killed Remus and founded the city of Rome or Roma as Italians call it. 

The city became the centre of the Roman Empire and the capital of Catholics and continues to grow embracing vibrant modernity.

Its global recognition has inspired a number of popular sayings such as "Rome wasn't built in a day" and "All roads lead to Rome". A proverb of 4th century says, "In Rome do as the Romans do". That inspired the Spanish writer, Miguel Cervantes, to write, "When thou art at Rome, do as they do at Rome."

Well, I don't really know what Romans do but some lines of the 1954 song, "Veni Vidi Vici" say, "Down by the shore of sunny Italy....we kissed and then, we kissed and kissed again, exactly like the Romans used to do!"

A few other quotes, "A fool is one who admires other cities without visiting Rome"- Fracesco Petrarca; "We can watch the sun in Rome, sparkling on a palace dome"- Dean Martin; "Rome will exist as long as the Coliseum does; when the Coliseum falls, so will Rome; when Rome falls, so will the world"- St. Venerable Bede, English Benedictine monk. Eternal City indeed!

A large number of epic movies such as Ben Hur, Cleopatra, Gladiator and its sequel have been made about the Roman Empire. For showing monuments in their original shape and for the sake of preservation, replicas were made for structures like the Colosseum. Modern movies with stories set in Rome have freely used actual locations popular with tourists. The Colosseum itself featured prominently in “When in Rome” in which the lead characters of twins stay in a nearby house and ride all over the city on their Vespa scooter.

Then there was “Roman Holiday” which brought Rome live to us in 1953. Audrey Hepburn played the part of a princess who escapes from her security guards and goes around Rome with a journalist, Gregory Peck, again on a Vespa. With them we were taken on a sightseeing tour of the city including slurping a gelato on the Spanish Steps.

If you wish to emulate them, Vespas are available on rent near Piazza Venezia in Rome. Here, I wish to disclose that I have been a proud owner of Vespa in my younger days and driven around many cities but mostly with an unoccupied pillion.

Trevi Fountain, one of Rome's chief attractions, has featured prominently in many movies. The belief is that if you throw a coin with your right hand over your left shoulder, you will return to Rome; two coins will bring a new romance and three coins guarantee a wedding in Rome."Three Coins in the Fountain" with the theme song by Frank Sinatra was a popular movie of 1954 with its story of three friends making their wishes and throwing coins in the Fountain.

Another film where the Fountain was in the spotlight was Federico Fellini's 1960 award winning "La Dolce Vita" with its iconic scene of handsome Marcello Mastroianni and voluptuous Anita Ekberg frolicking and splashing water in the Fountain.

A recent movie with one third of it belonging to Rome was "Eat Pray Love". Julia Roberts played the part of Elizabeth Gilbert who after a divorce travelled to Italy, India and Bali to rediscover herself. In Rome, she gets hooked on Italian cuisine and the movie has lovely scenes of Castel Sant'Angelo and Piazza Navona and this time it is Julia slurping gelato in front of a church at Navona.

More of Spanish Steps in "The Talented Mr. Ripley", Piazza del Popolo, churches and St. Peter's Square in Tom Hanks starrer "Angels and Demons", but what is forever embedded in my heart is the deeply sentimental scene in "Lovers Must Learn" later renamed as "Rome Adventure" : the lead characters Troy Donahue and Suzanne Pleshette walk into a nightclub and as they sit down on their table, Emilio Pericoli launches into his unforgettable song, "Al Di La." Dazed, the two stare into each other's eyes, Suzanne asks Troy what does "Al Di La" mean, Troy searches for the right translation and whispers, "Beyond the Beyond." The scene and the song could melt the stoniest of hearts. 

There must have been something there for Suzanne and Troy to fall in love and marry in real life.

Some other popular songs are Lou Monte's "Roman Guitar", Elvis Presley's "Heart of Rome" and Madonna's "Justify My Love" in which she sings, "I want to hold your hand in Rome". Of course, the list would never be complete without Dean Martin and his "On An Evening In Roma".

Throwing a coin in Trevi Fountain on each visit has worked and I just completed my fifth trip to Rome. This time, at my age, I was hesitant to throw a coin but did so on Akhila’s insistence. Well, perhaps a return in my next life if not this one! So here is a quote to end this post-

"If we could be reborn wherever we chose, how crowded would Rome be"- Francine Prose.

And Nat King Cole sang, "Arrivederci Roma."

.

WEE-BIT MORE ON "SISTERS"- IN A LIGHTER VEIN

Mummy, the first child of my grandparents, was named Bimla. The name signifies 'purity' and 'innocence'. So when she was followed by another girl, Pitaji and Mataji aptly named her Nirmala which had a similar significance, viz. 'cleanliness' and 'virtuosity', and satisfied the prerequisite of rhyming.

The next set of girls came from Mansi and preserving the tradition set by her parents, she named her daughters Manjula and Anjula.

My wife also comes from the same small community of Brahmins called 'Suryadwajs' as I do. Our fathers studied in Agra College together and were very good friends. At our first meeting, I, as well as most of my family, knew her only as Binno, a name by which she is still called by our relatives. When our marriage was fixed, we needed her real name for the wedding card and were told it was Akhila. Another rhyme!

Summer of 1997, Mummy and Mansi decided to visit the US where stays Navin, Mansi's younger son. In an intimate conversation, his wife, an American, laughingly coined the term "La-la girls" for them.

Guess her name.

"Pamela"!

Out of context and not at all relevant to my earlier blog and, therefore, rightly omitted, for those who don't know the song "Sisters", here, for a laugh, are the closing lines:-

"Many men have tried to split us up but no one can

Lord, help the mister who comes between me and my sister

And Lord help the sister who comes between me and my man".

Sharing has its limits!

 

A TALE OF TWO SISTERS

In "White Christmas", that super evergreen 1954 movie, there was a delightful song and dance number by Rosemary Clooney and Vera Ellen. They sang,

"Sisters, sisters, there were never such devoted sisters....

Caring, sharing, every little thing that we are wearing

When a certain gentleman arrived from Rome

She wore the dress and I stayed at home.

All kinds of weather, we stick together, the same in the rain or sun,

Two different faces, but in tight places, we think and we act as one....

Those who've seen us, know that not a thing could come between us...."

Today is the 103rd birth anniversary of my Mansi, Nirmala, Mummy's younger sister by just over two years. I recall the very close relationship of the two sisters who, even after marriage, got together whenever they could rather than seek company of others or visit new places. Both were married very young but Mummy became a widow at 21 with me at 4. I was then taken care of by my Nana and Nani and Mummy sent to Benares followed by Allahabad for post Matric studies. (Not familiar with these places? They don't exist any more as, let me check....they are now Varanasi and Prayag respectively!). During vacations when Mummy came home, Mansi would come over too. 

Post graduation, Mummy started teaching and Mansi's family expanded. Now she took to calling us over to her place. I remember two wonderful summer holidays, one in Delhi in 1948 in the then Diplomatic Enclave (Chanakyapuri) and the second in 1949 in Dehradun and Mussoorie, the latter famous or infamous for my skating mania which almost got me lost!

I joined the NDA and the Navy and Mansi's visits to my grandparents and Mummy continued. On many of my leaves, Mansi was there too and that added fun to my holiday. I marvelled at the closeness of the sisters and how they were always one in their thoughts and outlook and took the same stand on all family matters.

Mummy passed away in Jaipur on Christmas Day in 2010, just over a month short of 90. Mansi came over twice, once during Mummy's short illness and again for the 'tehravi'. Mansi followed Mummy just over a year later, a day short of 89. So ended the era of the two loving sisters.

Mansi was true to her name Nirmala, meaning pure, immaculate and flawless. The dictionary says it signifies a clean, honest and virtuous nature, true descriptions of Mansi.

And I will always remember her winsome, charming and mystic smile.

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS, NOT SHEEP

A cup and a saucer always go together. Is it because the tea or coffee may spill from the cup and stain your clothes or just that it is easier to hold the saucer than the cup? Some take to sipping the hot drink from the saucer, a habit considered to be uncultured and as we say in Hindi, "ganwar" meaning boorish or rustic..

The other day, a naval friend of mine, Anup Thomas, himself a writer, sent me a poem, "Drinking From My Saucer" by John Paul Moore, which gives a different dimension to the act: "I'm drinking from my saucer 'cause my cup has overflowed." It is a sweet, emotional poem thanking God for the blessings bestowed so much so that the cup of life has overflowed making one gratefully drink from the saucer. The opening lines define the beautiful thought-

"I've never made a fortune and it's probably too late now

But I don't worry about that much, I'm happy anyhow.

And as I go along life's way, I'm reaping better than I sowed

I'm drinking from my saucer 'cause my cup has overflowed."

As is my wont, I then fell to recalling some old songs with similar themes. "Count Your Blessings" was first sung by Bing Crosby, the 'old Groaner', in the all-time great Christmas movie "White Christmas", the title song of which, also sung by Crosby, is on everyone's lips in the Yuletide season. Here is what "Count Your Blessings" says,

"When I'm worried and I can't sleep

I count my blessings instead of sheep

And I fall asleep counting my blessings.

When my bankroll is getting small

I think of when I had none at all

And I fall asleep counting my blessings."

An amazing fact: Irving Berlin, the composer of the song, went to see a psychiatrist for insomnia. After listening to the steps Berlin narrated for attempts to sleep, the psychiatrist asked, "Have you tried counting your blessings?" Insomnia cured and a song was born!

"Crying in the Chapel" was a popular number expressing contentment and was sung by various top artistes of old including Elvis Presley. I loved the version by my favourite singer in my schooldays, Frankie Laine. Its opening lines go thus - 

"You saw me crying in the chapel

The tears are shed were tears of joy

I know the meaning of contentment 

Now, I'm happy with the lord."

I have experienced similar feelings in my numerous visits to the Shreenathji temple in Nathdwara and when on a trip to Rome, I stood transfixed in St. Peter's Basilica in Vatican City in front of Michelangelo's "Pieta" with sounds of an organ playing Schubert's "Ave Maria". 

Sometimes when things go wrong one feels like questioning God. Frankie Laine did that in "Answer Me" -

"Answer me, Lord above

Just what sin I have been guilty of?

Tell me how I came to lose my love

Please answer me, oh Lord."

Laine was gentle. Our own old singing maestro, Kundan Lal Saigal, was much more questionoing in a sad and emotive song addressing not God but "Kaatib-e-taqdeer" meaning 'writer of destiny'. The lines are classic:

"Aye kaatib-e-taqdeer mujhe itna bata de, itna bata de

Kyoon mujhse khafa hai tu kya maine kiya hai.

Auron ko khushi mujhko faqat dardo ranj-o-gham

Duniya ko hansi aur mujhe rona diya hai....

Kya thi khata ki jiski sazaa tooney mujh ko di

Kya tha gunah ke jiska badla mujhse liya hai

Kya maine kiya hai, kya maine kiya hai

Kyoon mujhse khafa hai tu, kya maine kiya hai?"

(Oh writer of destiny, just tell me this much, just this much

Why are you angry with me, what have I done

To others happiness but to me only pain, sorrow and grief

You have given laughter to the world and crying for me....

What was the guilt for which you have awarded punishment for me

What was the crime for which you have taken revenge from me

What have I done, what have I done

Why are you angry with me, what have I done?)

Some questions may remain unanswered particularly for the sufferer. The Bhagavad Gita says that we have to keep performing our duty sincerely with due devotion to God and not think about or attempt to claim the fruits of our actions. Do good and good will follow.

So wrote Richard Rodgers in “Something Good" which Maria and Captain von Trapp sing, happy and together, after falling in love with each other in "The Sound of Music". 

"Nothing comes from nothing, nothing ever could

So somewhere in my youth or childhood

I must have done something good."

THE MOVIE "MATERIALISTS" - WORDS TO TAKE YOUR HEART AWAY

Growing up into adulthood in the National Defence Academy, I was taught three activities were a must to begin the day - Sh.., Shave and Shampoo. In those times, that applied not only to people in the Defence Services but to all. Iconic sportsmen like golfer Arnold Palmer, tennis star Rod Laver and cricketer and Brylcreem face Denis Compton, all appeared freshly shaved and well-groomed. Girls' heart throb Shammi Kapoor had a clean face and hair nicely combed though cast as "Junglee" and screaming "Yahoo" in the film of the same name.

Not now, as exemplified by today's popular hero Ranveer Singh in "Dhurandhar" I and II. I don't know about the first activity but Shave and Shampoo don't seem to appeal to today's young men including our Cricket heroes who only have time for T20s but not Tests!

This fashion fits well with today's movies like the two mentioned above which are full of violence, blood and gore. Gone are the days of simple love stories like "Breakfast at Tiffany's" with Audrey Hepburn mesmerising us with "Moon River". So it was a delightful surprise when, on a whim, I viewed last year's "Materialists" on Netflix the other day. No foul language, no fights, no ugly scenes, just a plain love story with captivating dialogue.

Its story is about Lucy (Dakota Johnson) working in a matchmaking firm. Her efforts have resulted in nine marriages for her clients and she is upbeat for more. But her own love life is in a bit of a mess. She has broken off with her boyfriend John (Chris Evans) due to differences in financial aspirations and, after initial reluctance, starts dating rich Henry (Pedro Pascal). She has a client, Sophie (Zoe Winters) for whom, after some difficulty, Lucy arranges a date with Mark. 

Lucy's successful run of matchmaking receives a jolt when Sophie files a case against the company claiming Mark assaulted her after the date. Sophie refuses to meet Lucy who persists and finally catches up with her to apologise. When Lucy claims that she arranged the date because Mark "checked the boxes", Sophie is livid that her life was being shaped by checking off boxes and she walks off calling Lucy a pimp.

I found this aspect of matchmaking very interesting and similar to the Hindu custom of parents rushing to astrologists with horoscopes of the prospective couple to 'check the boxes'. I am told that the astrologers look for 36 attributes and declare whether the couple make the match or not. Later people discover the hollowness of it all when matches backfire and mismatches succeed. (A generous tip to the astrologer can also help him fix the boxes!)

I shan't continue with the story as you might have seen the movie or may want to. But for me, the movie stands out because of its distinctive dialogue by its Writer and Director, Celine Song. Here are a few examples.  

1. Lucy: You're the same as always.

   John: I was hoping you'd say I was different.

   Lucy: Why?

   John: Because if I'm different, I wouldn't be the guy who lost you.

2. Lucy: You're investing a lot in me, huh?

   Henry: I just want our dates to be romantic.

   Lucy: How expensive a meal is makes a date romantic?

   Henry: Doesn't it?

3. Harry: I wouldn't date you if I didn't see value.....I don't want to date you for your material   assets. Material assets are cheap, they don't last. I want to be with you for your intangible assets.   Those are good investments. They don't degrade. They only get sharper.

4. Lucy: I don't want to hate you because you're poor but right now I do and it makes me hate   myself.....And however much you hate me, I promise, I hate myself more.

   John: I don't hate you.

   Lucy: You do. And it's not because we're not in love. It's because we're broke.

5. John: You asked how I could love you. I just do; it's the easiest thing.

    Lucy: I love you too. More than you know. You're the only reason I know I'm capable of love.

    John: I love you now like I loved you before. I"ll love you till the day I die. It's a lifetime         guarantee.....I"ll be your certainty. It's my final offer. You can't negotiate because I don't have     anything else to offer you.

    Lucy: (after a pause, extends a hand) Deal.

6. Lucy: Who our partner is...it determines our whole life and how we live. Not for one, two, ten years, but forever.

With love, nothing is a lot. Without love, a lot is nothing.