FUNNY HINDI SONGS

 

If there are funny songs in English, Hindi songs can more than hold their own. 

Since most popular Hindi songs are from movies, that is where to go to look for them. For the first one, we go back to 1947 and the film ‘Shehnai’ which featured ‘Sunday Ke Sunday’ sung by Meena Kapoor and Ram Chitalkar. I don’t know anything about the movie but I remember Vinnie Mama coming home to Bharatpur during his summer vacations fromब Allahabad University and singing the song for me. We termed it our national anthem and used to sing it together whenever we met. The lyrics will have you in fits of laughter-

Ram: “Aana meri jaan meri jaan, Sunday ke Sunday…, I love you”

Meena: “Bhag yehan se tu.”

R: “Tujhe Paris dikhaoon, tujhe London ghumaoon, tujhe brandy pilaoon, whisky pilaoon, Aur khilaoon murgi ke ande ande, aana meri jaan Sunday ke Sunday.”

M: “Are hut, Sayyan mera pehlwan hai, maare dund hazar,

Bhag jaoge tum bandar dega jo lalkar, 

Maare gin gin ke, gin gin ke, dande, dande”.

R: “Aana meri jaan meri jaan Sunday ke Sunday.”

Two years later, Roop K. Shorey directed a film, ‘Ek Thi Ladki’, featuring the song ‘Lara Lappa Lara Lappa’ which became an instant hit. It was sung by Meena in the movie with the background voice of Lata Mangeshkar. Little did I know that in 1959, Vinnie Mama would marry Roop Shorey’s sister. Affectionately known as ‘Bhaijaan’, he was a very friendly person and we would have many a whisky together. Getting back to the song, here are some interesting lyrics-

“Lara lappa lara lappa, laai rakhda, aadi tappa aadi tappa laai rakhda,

O dekar jhoote laare…

Babuji ki baat niraali, dil bhi khaali, jeb bhi khaali, phir bhi akad dikhayen re…

Aajkal ke gentleman, rehte hain hardam bechain,

Kaam kare na kaaj, phir bhi akad dikhayen re….

Aaj kal ki naariyaan, hai muft ki bimaariyaan, bimaariyaan,

Raat din mardon se ladne, ki karen taiyyariyaan,

Kaam kuchh karti nahin, aur baandhti hain saadiyaan…”

Raj Kapoor directed and produced an award winning movie “Boot Polish” in which a bald David delights us with ‘Lapak Jhapak Tu Aare Badarwaa’ urgently imploring clouds to burst because-

“Sar ki kheti sookh rahi hai, baras baras tu aare badarwaa….

Tere ghade main paani nahi toh, panghat se bharlaa tu badarwaa….

Bhoodal se tu baal ugaade, jhatpat tu barsa re badarwaa,

Lapak jhapak, lapak jhapak, lapak jhapak.”

Kishore Kumar had arrived on the music scene in early ‘50s followed by acting in movies such as ‘Chalti Ka Naam Gaadi’ in which he also sang the title song. For me, one of his funniest songs was ‘Zaroorat Hai Zaroorat Hai’ from ‘Man Mauji’ in ’62. It brings back memories of my late friend, Aku Roy, who used to sing it often. 

“Zaroorat hai zaroorat hai, sakht zaroorat hai,

Ek shrimati ki kalawati ki, seva jo kare pati ki….

Adaaon mein bahar ho, nigaahon mein khumaar ho, kubool mera pyaar ho….

Pyaar se jo kaam le, hans ke salaam le, jo mera haath thaam le, toh kya baat hai,

Zaroorat hai, zarorat hai, zaroorat hai.”

Kishore Kumar and Mehmood will always be unforgettable for ‘Padosan’ and its hilarious song, ‘Ek Chatur Naar’. The song defies description and has to be seen on the screen which I am sure most of us have done. It is sung from two windows facing each other across a street. Bhola (Sunil Dutt) is trying to impress his love interest Bindu (Saira Banu) who is fond of classical music and is under the tutelage of a South Indian instructor Master Pillai (Mehmood). Bhola cannot sing for nuts and is helped by Vidyapati (Kishore Kumar) who does the singing in the background with Bhola lip-syncing the lyrics. This song is a duel between Bhola and Masterji with the latter delighting the audience with South Indian accent and mannerisms and Vidyapati driving Masterji to distraction by manufacturing absurd lyrics and monkeying antics.

I don’t know the 1970 movie ‘Pagla Kahin Ka’ but can’t forget the Manna Dey song, ‘Meri Bhains Ko Danda Kyun Mara’-

“Woh khet mein chaara charti thi, tere baap ka woh kya karti thi….

Woh laddoo pede khati hai, haan, woh pedon pe chadh jaati hai, haan,

Yeh machchar been bajate hein, woh apna raag sunati hai,

Woh thumak thumak naache jab mein dil ka bajaoon ektara,

Meri bhains ko danda kyun mara, meri bhains ko danda kyun mara.”

In a Dev Anand movie, ‘Chhupa Rustom’, SD Burman directed a parody of his own popular song, ‘Dheere Se Janaa Bagiyan Mein’. This one, sung by Kishore Kumar, was titled ‘Dheere Se Janaa Khatiyan Mein, O Khatmal.’ The song goes-

‘Soyi hai rajkumari, dekh rahi meethe sapne, ja ja chhup ja takiyan mein….

Komal hai inka badan, kaante si teri chubhan….

Kyon chhup chhup ke pyaar kare tu, barha chhupa hua Rustom hai tu,

Lele humko bhi sharan mein, O khatmal, dheere se jaana khatiyan mein.”

Most of Amitabh Bachchan’s movies include a funny song performed by him. In ‘Amar Akbar Anthony’, emerging on the stage from an egg, he delivered some lines in near rap-style leaving Kishore Kumar to do the singing in 'My Name Is Anthony Gonsalvez.' Kishore gave the playback for Bachchan’s ‘Khaike Paan Banaraswala (khul jaaye bund akal ka tala)’ and a host of other songs. Then in ‘Mr. Natwarlal’, Bachchan sang on his own in the delightful ‘Mere Paas Ao (mere doston ek kissa suno)’ in which he tells a gathering of children about an encounter with a lion. The funniest song he sang is probably ‘Mere Angne Mein’ from ‘Laawaris’-

“Mere agne mein tumhara kya kaam hai, jo hai naamwala wohi to badnaam hai…” and then he goes on to describe functions a wife can perform depending on her build or complexion. So a tall wife makes a ladder redundant, a fat one, a mattress, a dark one, eyeliner, a fair one, electricity, and a tiny one, a kid in the lap!

But the song I love the most and which has special memories for me is ‘Jehan Teri Yeh Nazar Hai’ from ‘Kaalia’. In ’83, when I was Fleet Operations Officer, Western Fleet, we went on a goodwill cruise to a few Gulf countries. In Muscat, late YN Sharma and I went sightseeing in a taxi. The driver put on this number on the car audio and the song and the lovely drive through the countryside have lodged in my memory ever since-

‘Hey dhin patapat dhingri poko puk puk poko,

Dhin patapat dhingri poko puk puk poko, 

Jehan teri yeh nazar hai, merijaan mujhe khabar hai,

Bach na saka koi aaye kitne, lambe hain mere haath itne,

Dekh idhar yaar, dhyaan kidhar hai….

Kyoon nahin jaani tu yeh samajhta, kaam nahin hai yeh tere baska, kukroon kuku….

Hosh mein aaja, dhyaan kidhar hai, arre, hosh mein aaja dhyan kidhar hai,

Jehan teri yeh nazar hai, meri jaan mujhe khabar hai,

Bach na saka koi aaye kitne, lambe hain mere haath itne,

Dekh idhar yaar, dhyaan kidhar hai, 

Jehan teri yeh nazar hai, merijaan mujhe khabar hai.”

I kept on telling the driver again and again, “Play it again, Sam.”

Tailpiece: As I was typing this, I found my wife, nine years younger to me, peering over my shoulder reading this and humming “Mein kya karoon Ram mujhe budhda mil gaya”. When I looked back she quickly said, “It just came to mind, nothing personal”.