FATHER OF THE BRIDE 2022

 

Every now and then, a movie comes which pleasantly surprises and emotionally stirs one. After “The Last Letter From Your Lover”, the new 2022 movie “Father Of The Bride” did that to me.

I hadn’t even heard of the third remake of this film till Akhila and I visited ‘Little Havana’ in Miami. There we saw a big crowd of well-dressed Latin Americans outside a movie theatre next to the Domino Park named after that game which Cubans sit down and play there.  On inquiring, we were told that they were waiting for the theatre to open for the premiere of “Father Of The Bride”. 

Back home after a round of Calle Ocho, the main street of Little Havana with its famous nightclub ‘Ball and Chain’, cigar rolling shops, and a café called ‘La Colada’ which specializes in Cuban coffee, I read on the internet that the film had been remade for the third time centering on a Cuban family in USA.

My interest in the movie was ignited and on return to New York, I discovered that it was available on TV on HBO and one evening, we sat down to watch it. Soon after the start, we were delighted to see scenes of Domino Park and Calle Ocho with its Ball of Chain and Tower Theatre where the premiere had taken place. No wonder the premiere had attracted a large crowd as it must have included many Cubans and others who had shops and cafes in Little Havana. Otherwise too, the movie has many scenes of Miami and it was great to see on the screen all the places we had just visited a few days ago- the Design District famous for its luxury shops and the colourful murals and paintings in Wynwood Walls, Biltmore and Shelborne Hotels and the man-made Star Island in Biscayne Bay. In fact, I read somewhere that the film was planned as a tribute to Miami.

One wondered whether the third remake would look hackneyed but the Director and the Scriptwriter have done a wonderful job in recasting the story to give it an original touch. Only the central theme of the parents being caught totally by surprise by their daughter’s sudden news of engagement and the father’s initial resistance are common to the previous two movies. An new twist to the story is provided by the film beginning with the parents at a marriage counselor’s office and the mother insisting that they break the news of their decision to divorce immediately on arrival of their daughter. So there are two simultaneous themes- the engagement and wedding of the daughter and the mother’s insistence to proceed with the divorce proceedings regardless. How the father copes with the two deeply emotional issues is told in a touching way that tugs at one’s heartstrings and yet the movie never gets maudlin but retains its light and breezy tempo.

An added nostalgic flavor is provided by a short clip of Ingrid Bergman in ‘Casablanca’ urging the pianist to “Sing it, Sam” which he does with the timeless classic ‘As time goes by’.

The cast of the film is appropriately Latino. The bewildered and bothered father and husband, Billy Herera, is played by the well-known Andy Garcia famous for his role in ‘GodfatherIII’. He brings out the turmoil in his mind and heart superbly. The mother and wife, Ingrid, determined to go ahead with the divorce soonest, is played competently by Gloria Estefan who is more  known for her singing. Remember her great hits ‘Conga’ which is ranked as the 11th greatest Latin pop song of all time, and ‘Rhythm Is Gonna Get You’? She is a Cuban, a 7-time Grammy winner, and has a star with her name on the Walk Of Fame at Calle Ocho. Puerto Rican actress Adria Arjona, plays the fiercely independent daughter, Sofia, who loves her father but must have her way to get what she wants. The fiancée, Adan Castillo, is a soft-spoken guy very much in love with Sofia but desires to earn Billy’s approval and blessings first. He is a Mexican as is the actor Diego Boneta who plays the role.

A movie I truly loved. Three takeaways for old men of my generation:- 

Decreasing relevance,

Expected presence,

Increasing acquiescence.

TEN YEARS AFTER

Ten years ago on this day, I underwent a delicate surgery. The next year, I recorded words of appreciation and gratitude for my dear doctor. I stumbled upon it while going through my files and thought I should put it on my blog. So here it is.

"We had come to visit our son in New York last year when in very early hours of 21 June 2012, I suddenly fainted and was taken to St. Luke’s Roosevelt (now Mt. Sinai) Hospital. It was diagnosed that I had suffered a ‘ruptured left MCA aneurysm’ and was immediately operated upon and admitted in the ICU ward. There I was put under the overall care of Dr. Rup Swarup.

Right from the start, Dr. Swarup took personal care to ensure my speedy recovery and left no stone unturned to make me comfortable and at home. He visited me a number of times every day to ensure my well-being. 

A few days later, it was discovered that I was suffering from Hydrocephalus. The neurosurgeon who had operated upon me felt that I should undergo a shunt implant. Dr. Swarup was of the view that we should wait and watch rather than hurry to put a foreign body in my brain. The neurosurgeon was insistent but Dr. Swarup took personal responsibility for my case and deferred the implant. Meanwhile, he referred me to another neurosurgeon, Dr. Phil Steig at Cornell Weiss, who agreed with Dr. Swarup and suggested to wait and watch. After a fortnight, it was found that the hydrocephalus had subsided and the shunt was not required. The post-operative angiogram revealed that a small residual remained for which Dr. Steig advised a review after six months. I was then allowed to return home to New Delhi.

One year has passed and I have recently had a follow-up examination which showed that I have made a fair recovery and the residual has not grown.

During this period, Dr. Swarup visited Delhi twice and found time to come and see me and inquire after my welfare. On my return to New York for the check-up, he has gone out of his way to organize the examinations and taken personal interest in the results. As regards the residual, Dr. Steig suggested another angiogram 2-3 years hence as he was doubtful that a non-invasive MRI would reveal the residual aneurysm. Dr. Swarup took the stand that if the MRI showed the residual, it could be watched with further MRIs thus avoiding the invasive and radioactive angiogram. Accordingly, an MRI was done which showed the residual thus proving Dr. Swarup right.

My experience with Dr. Swarup has been most satisfying. His advice and diagnosis have always been spot-on. When convinced of his position, he has not hesitated to assert himself by overruling his colleagues. He has prevented my undergoing a shunt implant which I know from some friends’ cases can turn out to be persistently troublesome.

Dr. Swarup’s care, personal involvement and follow-up have been exceptional and well beyond what could be expected from a busy doctor. 

I consider myself fortunate to have been his patient."

Subsequent MRIs have shown that the residual exists no longer.

Tailpiece: Someone told me, "You live in song." Yes, I happily do. And the day makes me recall the musical group 'Ten Years After' singing at Woodstock in 1969, "I'm Going Home."

DRINK TO ME ONLY WITH THINE EYES

Songs and memories, memories and songs.  As Billy sang in ‘If I Loved You’ in “Carousel”, round in circles I go.

I was firmly in the present watching a movie, though I must admit the movie was steeped in the past. It was “Emma” based on Jane Austen’s 1815 novel of the same name about a cocky 20-year old girl whose main hobby was matchmaking for her friends and meddling in their lives. I was enjoying the period costumes and the manner in which people conducted themselves in those days when a song was featured in the movie which transported me back to school in the early 1950s. . 

The song was “Drink To Me Only With Thine Eyes” taught to us by Father Mackessack in his music class in St. Xavier's, Jaipur. Its lyrics are from a poem, “To Celia”, written by Ben Jonson and published in 1616. Despite its age of 400 years plus, it retains its charm and appeal.  As recent as 2006, Johnny Cash revived it in a popular rendition.

The words are metaphorical about pure love, emotion and feelings. The poet asks Celia to drink to him with her eyes, that is, give him an engaging look, which would be enough for him to pledge his eternal love. And her kiss within the cup is all that he desires instead of earthly wine or even the nectar of the king of gods. 

That’s enough from me; over to Ben Jonson:

“Drink to me only with thine eyes, and I will pledge with mine,

Or leave a kiss within the cup, and I will not ask for wine.

The thirst that from the soul doth rise, doth ask a drink divine;

But might I of Jove’s nectar sup, I would not change for thine.”

An ethereal song.